AMA Chat: “I thought I forgave myself… why does it still feel like a fresh wound every month?”
I just finished reading through the AMA questions that came in this month and… damn. You all are in it. These weren’t surface-level check-ins. These were deep.
Marriage struggles. Triggers on repeat. Emotional shutdowns. Partner dynamics that make you feel like you’re losing your mind.
I truly felt so much resonance reading your shares, because I’ve been in so many of these moments myself, especially lately. And what always blows my mind is that even though your questions were each unique, there were some big patterns that showed up that are similar.
So let’s break down a few of the themes that came through and talk about what’s actually going on underneath, and how to meet it with care, curiosity, and maybe even a little grace for yourself.
1. “I thought I forgave myself… why does it still feel like a fresh wound every month?”
This took me right back to the early years of my healing journey. I had done so much work around forgiving my parents— the abuse, the neglect and then I’d find myself spiraling again. Same pain, same wound, and I’d be like… wait, seriously? I’ve already been here. Why is this coming up again?!
And what I realized is: Healing isn’t about never getting triggered again. It’s about how we relate to the trigger when it comes up.
If it comes up every month, especially in your luteal phase, when your body is already more sensitive— that’s not failure. That’s your system saying: “Hey, something still needs holding here.”
If this pattern resonates for you, ask yourself these questions: