Codependency Alchemy

Codependency Alchemy

Share this post

Codependency Alchemy
Codependency Alchemy
July Events for Codependency Alchemy

July Events for Codependency Alchemy

Come join our live sessions and do shadow work and inner child healing around codependency patterns that might be negatively impacting your relationships.

Alyssa Zander's avatar
Alyssa Zander
Jun 29, 2025
∙ Paid
2

Share this post

Codependency Alchemy
Codependency Alchemy
July Events for Codependency Alchemy
1
1
Share

Summer is here, and for a lot of us, things are heating up— not just the weather, but our emotions too. Maybe you’ve been feeling extra sensitive lately. Maybe family stuff is bubbling up, or your relationship feels confusing. Maybe you’re trying really hard to stay calm, but other people’s moods keep pulling you in. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone.

This month inside Codependency Alchemy, we’re focusing on two big themes that can help you feel more grounded, more clear, and more connected to yourself— no matter what’s going on around you.

yellow sunflower field

Last month in the membership

For the month of June we explored how to stay regulated when you are triggered in your relationship (something I think we can all relate to).

When your relationship triggers you

When your relationship triggers you

Alyssa Zander
·
Jun 6
Read full story

I also shared a post From My Journal ✍🏾 where I opened up about the patterns I have learned from tracking my own cycle, and how it’s empowered me in moments I want to burn everything down.

NOTE TO SELF: Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make any decisions on this day

NOTE TO SELF: Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make any decisions on this day

Alyssa Zander
·
Jun 13
Read full story

We got really real in the AMA chat this month. From sharing about the patterns that bring up guilt or shame, to addressing our part in the dysfunctional dynamics with our partners, I answered some of the members questions regarding their relationships in this post.

AMA Chat: “I thought I forgave myself… why does it still feel like a fresh wound every month?”

AMA Chat: “I thought I forgave myself… why does it still feel like a fresh wound every month?”

Alyssa Zander
·
Jun 27
Read full story

July Themes

This month, we’re working with two big patterns that come up a lot in relationships: waiting for someone else to change, and carrying emotions that don’t belong to you. Both of these themes are tied to codependent habits we picked up as survival strategies — and both can keep us stuck in cycles of resentment, exhaustion, and self-abandonment. Inside the membership this month, we’ll unpack these patterns with love, curiosity, and some really practical tools to help you come back to you.

Loading...

Theme #1: When you’re waiting for them to change

This is the part of you that’s holding your breath. Maybe you’re staying in the relationship because you believe they’ll get it eventually. Maybe you’re hoping they’ll show up differently— love you better, communicate more, stop doing that thing that hurts. You're doing everything right and just waiting on them to meet you halfway.

What that looks like in relationship:

  • Staying in something that feels one-sided, “just in case” they change

  • Feeling anxious or resentful because you’re growing but they’re not

  • Putting your healing on hold until someone else catches up

  • Making excuses for their behavior because you see their potential

If you’ve ever said “they weren’t always like this,” or “I just wish they’d do the work too,” this is for you. Especially if you’re the one always trying to make it work, even when it’s hurting you.

What this theme will help you with:

  • Getting honest about what’s yours vs. what’s theirs

  • Reclaiming your power and releasing the waiting game

  • Identifying your needs and deciding what’s actually aligned

  • Making choices based on who they are, not who you hope they’ll become

Theme #2: Stop carrying everybody’s feelings

This is the pattern of feeling responsible for how everyone else feels. You sense someone’s energy shift and immediately think, Did I do something wrong? You’re constantly managing other people’s emotions — even when they haven’t asked you to — because it feels safer than letting them be upset.

What that looks like in relationship:

  • Walking on eggshells trying to avoid conflict

  • Over-apologizing or over-explaining just to keep the peace

  • Feeling overwhelmed because you’re holding everyone else’s pain

  • Getting physically drained after social interactions

If you’ve ever said “I just feel everything so deeply,” or you feel exhausted from trying to make sure everyone around you is okay, this one’s for you. Especially if you grew up in a home where emotional tracking was survival.

What this theme will help you with:

  • Understanding why your body learned to over-function emotionally

  • Creating safety inside your own nervous system

  • Learning how to separate what’s yours from what’s not

  • Feeling more peaceful, clear, and grounded in your own energy

🗳 Make sure you vote in the poll above and tell me which one you’re craving more of!


Want more support this month? Here’s what’s inside the membership

If you’re craving more than just the podcast or posts— if you want to actually do the work alongside a community of 275+ others who get it, then the Codependency Alchemy Membership was built for you.

Inside, you’ll get:

  • 💾 Access to The Gems 💎— my full archive of healing tools, journal prompts, and rituals with tangible practices you can start using today to regulate your nervous system, set boundaries, and reconnect with yourself

  • 🎧 20+ Masterclasses + Guided Meditations to help you identify and heal codependent patterns, stop self-abandoning, and feel safe being fully seen in your relationships

  • 💬 Weekly shadow work threads + monthly AMA-style (ask me anything) support inside our private member chat where you can share what’s alive for you and get personalized reflections from me

  • 💌 Exclusive From My Journal ✍🏾 entries that give you an intimate look at how I’m doing this work, too

That’s less than $6/month for over $900 in healing tools, support, and content you can return to again and again.

JOIN THE MEMBERSHIP TODAY


July Events for Codependency Alchemy

These events are most easily accessible on the Substack app, so if you haven’t downloaded it yet, you can do so by clicking the link below!

Get more from Alyssa Zander in the Substack app
Available for iOS and Android

🎙️Live Podcast on Substack Live

July 16th | 10am (PST)

Join us for our live recording for the podcast. Together we’ll dive into topics, questions, and reflections that are alive for us. These lives are now being shared as a podcast episode on Codependency Alchemy: The Podcast!

📱AMA Chat | Private Podcast Episode

Instead of going back and forth in the chat (which I’m realizing isn’t sustainable long-term), I’ll be collecting your questions the week before our AMA Chat and answering them in a dedicated members-only post with a private podcast episode!

This way, I can go deeper and speak to the bigger themes that are coming up — so even if you don’t submit a question, chances are something I cover will still land.

💬 Shadow Work Sunday

Every Sunday in the Codependency Alchemy Chat

Every Sunday you’ll get shadow work prompts dropped in your inbox. This is where we take our healing to the next level. With over 275 members, it is clear that we are looking for a place to process, vent, share, and be witnessed. The Shadow Work Sunday Chat is a place for you to go to explore the theme of the month and be seen in wherever you are on your journey: struggle, grief, joy, celebration, confusion— all of it is welcome!

JOIN THE CHAT 💬


Be Featured on the Podcast!

As a Codependency Alchemy member, you can swoop one of the limited free 1:1 sessions this month! In return, your session will be featured and shared on Codependency Alchemy: The Podcast. I thank you babes so much for your vulnerability and courage to show up to this work and be seen in this way. If the sessions are sold out by the time you get to them, don’t worry, more will be released next month! Use the link below to book your session.

Paid subscribers: You get access to FREE one-on-one sessions that will later be featured on the podcast, as well as a library of masterclasses, meditations, and exclusive posts From My Journal ✍🏾. You can upgrade your subscription here.

This post is for paid subscribers

Already a paid subscriber? Sign in
© 2025 Alyssa Zander
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start writingGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture

Share